Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 NIV
In 1992 the queen of hip-hop soul, Mary J Blige, released a song titled Real Love. The song was
a hit and if you take a deep listen into the lyrics, Mary J Blige was truly searching for that “real
love”. Just like Mary J searched, many married couples search for real love. The problem is
many couples aren’t willing to do what it takes to attain real love. Real love requires work, it’s
not always pretty, and is sacrificial. However, real love is beautiful, rewarding, and
To sum it up real love is 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NIV),
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not
proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily
angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices
with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always
Real love is something that can only be experienced when God is allowed into the marriage. You
can either have “real love” or “struggle love”.
Real love spends time with God so that He can direct and cover the marriage. Struggle love only
seeks God when there are issues.
Real love understands that things won’t always be perfect, struggle love is only there for when
times are good.
Real love listens to the other person’s point of view with a sincere desire to understand. Struggle
love only listens to form a rebuttal so that they can prove a point.
Real love chooses to focus on the good in the other person. Struggle love focuses on who they
wish the other person would be.
Real love honors and upholds. Struggle love dishonors and disrespects.
Real love sacrifices to see the other person happy. Struggle love is always me first in thoughts
Real love handles issues with grace, compassion, and forgiveness. Struggle love handles issues
with grudges, conflict, and judgment.
Real love focuses on what I need to do to become the best version of myself. Struggle love focuses
on what the other should do better.
Real love is attainable by any couple who desires it. Real love is what we’re searching for but
struggle love is where we sometimes find ourselves in marriage.
The key to a great marriage is being aware of when you’re struggling and working together with
God to find that real love.